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Dear Mr. 50ish Balding Hawaiian Print Shirt Guy

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Dear Mr. 50ish balding Hawaiian print shirt guy with the very loud wife in the pink miniskirt at the UPS Store at 1:17 pm today,

You truly amazed me (and it takes a lot to amaze me) . I was amazed at the fact that you waited until Saturday afternoon to send out your package and letter. I was also pretty amazed at how pissed you got when the lady behind the counter told you that your stuff wouldn’t go out until Monday and would probably be delivered on Thursday.

The part that really got me though was when you said, “That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard!” in response to the bad (but reasonable) news.

Hun, you purchased the most basic service that UPS offers. If your stuff was going to be picked up today and there by Monday, imagine how quickly it would get there if you had really shelled out some dough! I bet they would have teleported your stuff!

That’s what you get for (#1) waiting until Saturday to send your “very important business merchandise” and (#2) being a cheapskate when you got there.

Thanks for the laugh,

Not as ridiculous as you

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