I try telling myself that I’m not constantly pissed off this pregnancy, but alas, that’s a big fat lie. Something about this fetus makes me ready to go at the drop of a hat. [Don’t fuck with me; I’ll cut ya.]
Hence the post about the baby shower and hence this post.
We went to Target yesterday for something supremely important [I’ve forgotten what it was.] and of course I had to pee because I have to pee every fifteen minutes or so. [This post talks a lot about pee and bathrooms…you’ve been warned.]
Since Tucker and Cara were with me, I made a beeline for the “family” restroom – family implies more than one person will by using the bathroom.
Let me make sure you get this concept. If you are by yourself, then wait your ass in line just like everyone else who is by themselves and doesn’t have an infant to change or a child who needs to go to the bathroom.
A couple of weeks ago, I stood in line for ten minutes while three kids playing in the bathroom stalls. After finally escaping bathroom hell, I was just in time to see a middle aged white guy leave the family restroom and unless he had his family tucked in his pockets then the guy was by himself. Tucker almost had to physically restrain me from saying something “constructive” to the pasty man.
Anyway, I didn’t write about it. I didn’t even Twitter it. I just let it go. I’m Zen like that.
Back to yesterday.
The family bathroom door was locked. I waited in line. As I was about to open the women’s bathroom door to leave, I heard Tucker talking to someone.
Apparently he was bitching with a mom about the fact that the woman who came out of the family bathroom was by herself. Luckily, I didn’t see the woman because I probably would have lost my shit.
Bravo to Tucker for being pissed for me.