The past couple of days have been interesting.
I’ve been meaning to write these little nuggets of goodness but just haven’t had the desire to actually do anything productive.
Day before yesterday, Oliver was feeling a bit warm and had developed a dry cough. Since the rest of the house had been sick, it wouldn’t have been a very far stretch of the imagination to think that Ollie might have been sick.
Our couch is pushed against the living room wall and I had stowed the thermometer and lubricant between the back of the couch and said wall since I had been taking Oliver’s temp while we were sitting on the couch. ANYWAY, at some point, Cara nabbed the lubricant…and disappeared.
After about five minutes of silence, I finally caught sight of Cara’s blond head in Sophie’s kennel.
Cara had unscrewed the bottle and managed to pour the entire thing on her shirt…and hands…and head.
Unfortunately, I have no photographic proof of this since I was feeding Oliver and Tucker was too busy cussing.
So I told you that we went in for Oliver’s re-weigh on Tuesday and that he’s gotten huge. I also told you that Jolly Ollie’s stump-hole thing got treated with silver nitrate. Everything was going fine until yesterday when the scab came off of the unhealed part of the hole.
The entire pseudo-belly button looked like it was in danger of turning inside out and there was exposed raw flesh. All in all, it was a pretty unsettling experience. I called and made an appointment so that a nurse could check Oliver out and I tried to just not look at Oliver’s stomach.
We showed up and got ribbed by a couple of the nurses for being there twice in one week. Cara screamed the entire fucking time even though we assured her that we weren’t there for her; Cara wasn’t buying it.
Actually, she screamed and bitched until a LPN came in who was wearing Curious George scrubs. Then she was pointing at the scrubs and squealing “George” with utter delight.
And then she started screaming again.
Oliver’s pediatrician put some more silver nitrate on Oliver’s stump-hole thing and told us to come back in a week if it was “still bothering me“.
I dropped Cara and Tucker off at the apartment and I made a “run to the line” to prepare for the VP debate. My plan was to drink every time the words “main street” were spoken by either candidate.
The guy at the drive-thru window hit on me profusely and called me honey. If he hadn’t been working at a drive-thru liquor store and I wasn’t pretty sure that he was drunk then I might have been flattered.
Right before Cara’s bedtime, she and I were sitting on the couch watching Wow Wow Wubzy while I fed Oliver.
As I was repositioning Ollie, I glanced over at Cara and the dork was sitting there with the second Boppy on her lap and her shirt pulled up.
Tucker’s going to Drill this weekend and that makes me happy.
Wait…that sounds bad.
School has got Tucker stressed the hell out and since I’m an insecure ninny, I automatically assume that he’s pissed at me which in turn stresses me the hell out.
So, compared to having a pissed off Tucker stomping around, being home alone with two kids will be a breeze. [But I might miss Tucker just a tiny bit. Don’t tell him though, ok?]
*Stochastic is the word of the day. Use it correctly in at least 3 sentences today.
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