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The Mothers’ Bill of Rights

Filed Under: Life
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When Tucker takes his shower before work, I always hear him talking to himself.

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He says he’s planning his day; I say he’s crazy. Pot, meet kettle.

This morning I was first to the shower though that’s not to say showering in the morning–or even everyday–is normal for me. By the time I get the kids fed and a cup of coffee in me, the email is beckoning to me and once that’s checked I have something else to jump into.

So when I jumped in the shower and usurped Tucker’s rightful first shower position, I got to thinking about the normal flow of the day and I was led to this: The Mothers’ Bill of Rights.

  1. You have the right to shower by yourself assuming your children are old enough to fend for themselves for fifteen minutes and/or an adult or child over the age of fourteen is available and willing to care for said younger children.
  2. You have the right to use the toilet with the door closed and be the only person in the bathroom.
  3. You have the right to completely finish one cup of coffee before being forced to break up a fight.
  4. You have the right to talk to someone on the telephone without having to tell your children to be quiet and/or walk to another room and barricade yourself inside.
  5. You have the right to watch something other than cartoons.
  6. You have the right to fix whatever you want for dinner and not hear complaints.
  7. You have the right to listen to what you want on the radio while driving.
  8. You have the right to not have to share whatever you’re drinking and/or eating.
  9. You have the right to sleep in your own bed with your significant other and only your significant other if that is what you wish.
  10. You have the right to get just enough sleep to start a new day and cross your finger that you can accomplish at least one of the things aforementioned.

Comments

  1. See. showers are better than day planners.

  2. Nice. I plan on linking this on Facebook.

  3. I’m thinking of printing this and hanging it on my bathroom door. Whenever either one of the boys violate one of the rules I’ll simply begin yelling “SEE RULE NUMBER SO-AND-SO!!!!” You’ve given me hope that I’ll someday be able to pee by myself again, Crazy Girl.

  4. I’mma print this and pin it to my shirt… then when someone wants to start something, I’mma be all, “UH. CHECK THE RULES.”

Trackbacks

  1. Wanda Suba says:

    RT @TheAmyTucker: The Mothers' Bill of Rights – http://su.pr/1KTaQD

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