Facebook Parenting or About the Guy Who Shot the Laptop

Filed Under: Life, Tech/Videos/Video Games
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Image | birgerking

With over 3.7 MILLION views on YouTube, almost 74 THOUSAND comments on the video, over 49 THOUSAND “likes” on Facebook, 21.5 THOUSAND Facebook shares and 22.5 THOUSAND comments on the original Facebook post, obviously this dad has sparked a conversation.

I finally watched the video and read the dad’s side of the story[below] and what I took away from the video is that these folks have been dealing with a teenager who has disrespected her parents in the past, has been punished for past transgressions and didn’t learn her lesson.

My daughter thought it would be funny/rebellious/cool to post on her Facebook wall just how upset she was and how unfair her life here is; how we work her too hard with chores, never pay her for chores, and just in general make her life difficult.

She chose to share this with the entire world on Facebook and block her parent’s from seeing it. Well, umm… she failed. As of the end of this video, she won’t have to worry anymore about posting inappropriate things on Facebook…

Maybe a few kids can take something away from this… If you’re so disrespectful to your parents and yourself as to post this kind of thing on Facebook, you’re deserving of some tough love. Today, my daughter is getting a dose of tough love.

I don’t get the adults who are raving at this guy.

What would you have done? Maybe you wouldn’t have shot up her laptop–I do consider that a waste of perfectly good tech. but I get he was making a point–but you agree she deserved some sort of punishment, right? Do you have a problem with it because he use a gun? It wasn’t like he brandished the gun at her.

Obviously, I don’t have a problem with what this dad did. What about you? Do you think what the dad did was justified or do you think it was too extreme?


  1. thepsychobabble says:

    I wouldn’t have destroyed the laptop, but I sure as heck wouldn’t have given it back to her, either. I wonder if people would have been as angry if he had chosen a hammer instead of a gun?

  2. BeckyWellsHood says:

    Like you, I think that shooting the laptop is a waste of a perfectly good laptop. Take it away from her, lock it in the trunk of your car, or sell it (cleaned and refurbished). I also would have taken down her Facebook page. And then, increased her chores. Also? How about assigning a pay rate to every chore expected of her, and then assigning a cost to all things provided for her.. breakfast, lunch, dinner, laundry, clothes, yada yada yada.

    • @BeckyWellsHood ” How about assigning a pay rate to every chore expected of her, and then assigning a cost to all things provided for her.” <– OH! This is good!

  3. jennyquarx says:

    He said he took it away before. Yes, it was a waste of the laptop. But message sent. The people who are outraged are probably the people who discipline their kids with “OH, Jimmy, don’t dooooooooooo that…” Extreme? Maybe. Nice follow through. He explained what she did, reminded her of what he told her the consequence would be, and followed through. He probably shouldn’t have done it publicly. But I applaud him. Paying your kids for chores should NEVER happen, IMO. She sounds like a spoiled little brat. It’s natural to rebel and bitch about your parents. But had I done something like she did, the consequences would also have been extreme. Good for him.

    • BeckyWellsHood says:

      @jennyquarx They would not be paying her ‘per se’ for her chores. They would ‘pay’ her and then take it back by charging her for her meals and laundry service etc. Teach her the lesson in the only language she apparently understands The Bottom Dollar. Don’t give her actual cash… keep an account. Also? Allowance=paying for chores. How else do kids learn to be financially responsible if they don’t earn their own money before they are legally able to get a job? nothing wrong with paying kids for chores. Teaches a lot of lessons.

    • jennyquarx says:

      @BeckyWellsHood I see your point. We got allowance but it was clear that it was not payment for our chores. We could pay each other to do the chores we did not want to do with our allowance. We did our chores. Allowance was just allowance. There was no not doing that chores – that would just be absurd in the house I grew up in. We also had to get jobs as soon as we could. Luxuries were not provided. We had to buy those things for ourselves. When we had proved we were responsible, we did get help with big things that we wanted, like cars to GET to work. We did not grow up in the computer/cell phone age but I guarantee my parents would have laughed if we asked for them. If we wanted them, we’d have had to buy them ourselves. And we would have. We had everything every other kid did and we paid for it ourselves. Maybe it’s my age, but I think that kids are just ridiculously spoiled today, and mine is probably among that group, but he is 5, he can’t get a job yet.

    • jennyquarx says:

      @BeckyWellsHood *the chores. Oops.

    • BeckyWellsHood says:

      @jennyquarx We got an allowance, and we had a list of chores that were expected (read mandatory) for us to do. My girls don’t get an allowance. They get birthday money and Christmas money and I will pay them to do extra things around the house. But chores are expected of them like paying the bills is expected of me. I was expected to get get a job at 16 as well, and I had to buy all of my vehicles.

      I had to buy my own name brand clothes and shoes so I started babysitting every single weekend at the age of 13. Kids don’t babysit these days like I used to.

      In fact just this week. my oldest daughter (14) brought home mid term grades with 2 D’s. I immediately took away her brand new iPod Touch and her laptop. (And don’t tell her, I feel HORRIBLE about it, b/c her sister still has hers) but I have to teach a lesson here and can not reward poor school performance.

      I dated a guy who gave his son a car for his 16th birthday. Apparently the ex wife gave the son a truck for his 16th birthday. Kid didn’t have his license yet but had 2 vehicles that he didn’t have to lift a finger to get, and didn’t pay a dime for, or for insurance or gas. Know what else he got? An over inflated sense of entitlement.


    • jennyquarx says:

      @BeckyWellsHood Good for you! That’s great parenting! We knew we were DAMN lucky to get cars (and they weren’t new or awesome, and they weren’t OURS either, and we had to maintain them and pay insurance and gas). I also had to pay for brand name clothes and shoes. And I didn’t feel like that was wrong or mean. I felt like my parents taught me valuable life lessons and as an adult I am very thankful for the delayed gratification that they taught me.

      I think we are in total agreement. Shooting the computer and posting it to Facebook was extreme. But I totally feel like parents DO give their kids an over inflated sense of entitlement as opposed to lessons in hard work, discipline, respect, self worth, and other tools that will help them in the real world.

    • BeckyWellsHood says:

      @jennyquarx I may be the least popular mom among my daughters’ friends, and my daughters may never have the latest and greatest phone or electronic gadget but I know this, they take better care of them, they have more respect and they understand the value of a dollar. Twice a year I will take them to the mall or to Target and give them $40 each and let them spend it however they want. They drive me nuts with the math they do trying to get the most for that money. But they understand money.

    • jennyquarx says:

      @BeckyWellsHood So then you are teaching them to be responsible people which is more than most people can admit. I’d rather be an unpopular parent than one raising an irresponsible and disrespectful human.

  4. couponprincess says:

    Here is an update on his daughter and how he WILL not go on talk shows etc.. and tell his story. Makes me have even more respect for the guy and his daughter has come to terms with her behavior etc.. must read. http://www.litefm.com/cc-common/mainheadlines3.html?feed=421220&article=9744152

  5. sarahcb1208 says:

    The follow-through, IMO, was perfect. She will see that laptop (or shell casing or whatever) and remember WHY it happened, that SHE caused it.

    I’m sorry but I’m seeing too many people say “child abuse” and what-not. No, that’s not child abuse. That is discipline. His daughter wasn’t harmed in it, emotionally or in any form.

    According to the follow-up, she was pissed, but recognizes it was her doing, her fault. I’m glad to know there are parents out there with a follow through.

  6. DanRitchie1991 says:

    I am 20, and don’t have kids, so this isn’t coming from any sort of authority on the subject, but I think this was perfectly reasonable.

    A lot of people seem to be making a lot of the fact that he used a gun to destroy the laptop. What’s the difference between using a gun or using a hammer? Destroying her laptop is going to send her a message, that she shouldn’t take what she has for granted. She isn’t going to be emotionally scarred or anything, so it’s really not that bad. I have lived a fairly privileged life, my parent’s aren’t rich, but they aren’t on the breadline either, and I’d l ike to think I wasn’t spoilt or self entitled enough to do anything like this girl did. I appreciate everything I’m given, and I have had some nice things, I got a motorbike and gear last birthday, and a laptop for Christmas. On the other hand, my sister got almost nothing because she seems to be very similar to the this man’s daughter, thinks our parents are out to get her and thinks her life sucks.

    The parenting on show in that video, to me, seems pretty excellent, and I hope his daughter has learnt her lesson now.

  7. I’m home with MD- She has RSV, so I’m getting the opportunity to catch up on your awesome blogness.  Anyway, I wondered if you saw this guy and his family on the TODAY show this morning.  It was a very interesting.  He basically said he would have handled it differently, but he didn’t regret it. Straddle fences much, dude? Anyway, Matt asked the daughter if she had a new laptop and the answer was no. At least the dad stuck to his guns (bad pun intended).  Apparently CPS also got involved and they did a home study, etc…

    • I saw an update where he said that CPS and the cops had come and had cleared them of any wrongdoing. I am kinda disappointed about the guy being a bit wishy-washy but maybe he just means he wouldn’t have posted it to YouTube? Maybe he regrets all of the media attention? 
      Sorry about the RSV, dude. That blows. 

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